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The following is a 936-word press release I received today from Wyndstorm Corporation. It sucks.
The best re-write – chosen by What’s Next Blog Readers – will win a Seth Godin Marketing Guru Action Figure.
Why this press release sucks:
1. It’s full of jargon
2. A “destination widget”? Gimme a break.
3. I don’t know WTF they are talking about, and I create widgets for clients
4. It’s 936 words, including a huge legal disclaimer that seems to say it might not even be true
5. It doesn’t include a link to an example of one of its widgets
I could go on…..
Your assignment, if you choose to accept it, is to re-write this godawful release into no more than 300 words and make it clear what they’re selling and why we should care.
UPDATE: Here’s Seth Godin’s re-write:

my rewrite:
We launched something today, but it’s not very good. Here it is: www.widgetthing.com
# # #

OK, here’s the Wyndstorm release:
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Contact: xxxxx xxxxxxxxxx
(703) 000-0000 tel.
(202) 000-0000 cell.
pr@wyndstorm.com
SOCIAL NETWORK INDUSTRY’S FIRST “DESTINATION WIDGET” OFFERS FASTEST GO TO MARKET PLATFORM FOR ONLINE SOCIAL MARKETING AND PROMOTIONS
Wyndstorm Corporation Launches Socialframes™ – An Innovative Social Media Platform Integrating Virtual Worlds, Viral Promotion, and Multi-Media Content Management
(June 26, 2008 – Washington, D.C.) – Wyndstorm Corporation (OTC/BB:WYND) (www.wyndstorm.com), the ideas to revenue social media company, announced today the release of Socialframes. Designed to proactively extend online social marketing and online promotions, Socialframes is the social network industry’s first and only “destination widget” – a small snippet of code that provides a user one-click access to a promotional Web site including a virtual world. Socialframes is comprised of a custom interactive environment with tailored content of any media type that can be pushed on a one-to-one basis no matter how many friends are in the Socialframes virtual destination.
The novelty of this innovative social media tool is that it finally offers online marketers and viral promoters fast turn-around customization of an experiential marketing program. Socialframes provides profile-based content management within an interactive online destination that includes in-scene IPTV (Internet Protocol Television) programming and video distribution within a 2.5D interactive virtual reality environment. Wyndstorm has successfully integrated all of these important features into this groundbreaking Web widget.

With Wyndstorm’s Socialframes product, any advertiser interested in participating in online promotions will benefit from faster and lower cost implementation compared to the high cost of internally-built technologies. With Socialframes, there is no need to hire advanced interactive programmers to rollout compelling and effective online promotions. Wyndstorm’s Socialframes product is a pre-built, interactive Web platform and content management system that enables the creation of dynamic, targeted online promotions in a matter of weeks versus months.
Based on Wyndstorm’s industry leading, flash-based technology, Socialframes lets multiple Internet users interact in virtual 2.5D environments without having to download additional software. As a destination widget, embedding a customized Socialframes online promotions campaign into existing Web 2.0 social networks or existing Web sites is easy. It enables the viral spread of a fully-featured Socialframes experience tailored to a company’s specific marketing campaign to an unlimited number of Web sites, attracting an even broader audience for viral marketing and dynamic content – all customized to end user profiles and preferences.
“Our dynamic multi-media content management system proactively extends online social marketing and Web-based promotions. Content placement is administrator-controlled with the click of a button with Socialframes’ easy-to-use social media platform so that the power of social media marketing can be optimized,” said Marian Sabety, Wyndstorm CEO. Sabety noted that Socialframes’ support for IPTV, video, text, and Web-linking integrated into a multi-user interactive experience makes Socialframes a must-have widget for marketing companies and advertising agencies who want to make an interactive social media promotions splash. “Brand marketers will love the ability to test a variety of promotions concepts or content delivery approaches. Companies looking to enhance sales will reap the benefits of collaborative online browsing for marketing intelligence and shopping with a friend for increased online sales,” explained Sabety.
Wyndstorm recently began marketing Socialframes to leading Fortune 1000 customers who seek a high return on investment way of enhancing existing online promotions for branding, buzz campaigns, product awareness, or other targeted Web-based marketing programs.
Potential industry applications for using Socialframes include online retail, training, gaming, financial services, transportation, and travel. As an example, online advertising of travel packages, or group travel specials, could be proactively promoted with razor-sharp targeting using a custom-tailored Socialframes program. Socialframes is tailored to be a fun, online interactive scene that encourages group browsing and purchasing, based on input from friends.
“The response to our Socialframes product has been overwhelmingly positive,” said Sabety. “There’s nothing available today that compares to this platform that can enable businesses to capitalize on the power of social marketing to generate new traffic and revenues, or increased brand awareness.”
About Wyndstorm Corporation
Wyndstorm Corporation is the ideas-to-revenues company, providing end-to-end social network technology and online marketing services. They design, build and host social media, multi-user gaming, online entertainment, and ecommerce Web properties. Utilizing pre-built and custom applications, the company provides Web 2.0 technologies for online destinations with 2.5D virtual platforms, advergaming, interactive entertainment, and social network-based viral marketing opportunities. Wyndstorm Corporation trades on OTC Bulletin Board under the symbol WYND. For more information, go to www.wyndstorm.com.
The information contained in this press release contains “forward-looking statements,” within the meaning of the Private Securities Litigation Reform Act of 1995, Section 27A of the Securities Act of 1933, as amended, and Section 21E of the Securities Exchange Act of 1934, as amended. A forward-looking statement is one which is based on current expectations of future events or conditions and does not relate to historical or current facts. These statements include various estimates, forecasts, projections of Wyndstorm’s future performance, statements of Wyndstorm’s plans and objectives, and other similar statements. Forward-looking statements include phrases such as “expects,” “anticipates,” “intends,” “plans,” “believes,” “predicts,” “estimates,” “assumes,” “projects,” “may,” “will,” “will be,” “should,” or similar expressions. Although Wyndstorm believes that its current expectations are based on reasonable assumptions, it cannot assure that the expectations contained in such forward-looking statements will be achieved. Forward-looking statements involve risks, uncertainties, and assumptions which could cause actual results to differ materially from those contained in such statements. Investors should not place undue reliance on the forward-looking statements contained in this press release, as they speak only as of the date of this press release, and Wyndstorm expressly disclaims any obligation or undertaking to publicly release any updates or revisions to any forward-looking statements contained herein.