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Blecch! The Ricola Cougher, that disgusting slimeball who coughs in crowds and then gives you money if you give him a coughdrop, is baaaack.
They have him go to hair salons, movie theaters, malls, parties and parks and cough. I’m not making this up. I could never make up something this lame!
The Ricola Mystery Cougher is, without a doubt, the most ill-conceived promotion in the world. It’s not fun, funny, interesting, clever, or sanitary. And it seems that it will never end. Stay out of New York you piglet. We have enough to worry about.
And lemme give you weirdos a word of advice: people in New Yawk don’t like to be looked at, let alone coughed on. A New Yorker with a short fuse — who, let’s say, just lost his Wall St job, or had her house foreclosed — might kill a freakin jerk who offers him or her a cough drop because they think they’ll get a million dollars for the gesture.
Kill the cougher already. We’ll come to the wake.