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PR Pitch From Hell - Flacks: White Space is Your Friend!

Dear Flacks: White space is your friend. And don't say "Booyah!" in a pitch. This is among the worst I've received. The site was interesting, but to protect the guilty, I've left out the name of the company and the publicist. It's not so much what she said, but how she said it. Because I am, indeed, interested in social media marketing metrics.devilish.png

"Wanted to share with you how New York advertising agency ABC is leveraging social media monitoring for their campaigns. With social media now a ubiquitous and powerful force for consumer empowerment, and with consumer vigilantes taking to the blogosphere, message boards, and social networks, now more than ever agencies need a way to monitor the online consumer dialogue. Early-adopters have long known the socialized web to be a source of underground information--and it has only been in the last year that business has taken serious note of this huge cultural shift-- the democratization of information and the empowerment of the consumer through unregulated self-expression. ABC is using XYZ's real-time social media monitoring for their client campaigns and have found the intelligence vital. Not only are they able to monitor a campaign's successes or weak spots in real time, but it allows ABC to adjust campaigns as needed on the fly. XYZ's product, DEF, provides real time data from blogs, message boards, and social networks, reporting both hard metrics such as inbound links and soft metrics such as tonal sentiment. One of the best features is XYZ blog "blank" monitoring which precisely targets top influencers within specific online communities. The result for ABC & their clients: campaigns with higher ROI's through precise execution based on real time feedback. Booyah!"
Yes, she did say Booyah! But that didn't help me know WTF she was talking about.

Tips for better email pitches:
- don't be cute in the subject line
- don't be mysterious in the subject line
- say what the pitch is about in the subject line
- Keep the pitch short
- Explain it in one or two short sentences, max
- break the content into bulleted points or short paragraphs
- Use white space between paragraphs
- Don't say "I just found your blog ..."
- Don't say "I'm sure you'll want to cover this"
- Keep it short
- Make a point
- Don't say Booyah!


Tags:
BL Ochman | Oct 21 07 4:10 | TrackBack (0)

Comments

Wow - I suppose the person forgot to read your post about how to pitch you from your MarketingSherpa interview. By the way, you said "don't be cute in the subject line". What was the subject of this email for future reference? Thanks, Cece

Posted by: Csalomonlee at October 22, 2007 4:49 PM

Sounds like BuzzLogic. If I'm right, do I get a prize? ;-)

Posted by: Nathan Snell at October 23, 2007 12:10 AM

Nathan - can't say, but no prizes. :>)
BL

Posted by: B.L. Ochman at October 23, 2007 4:22 PM

Drat, fair enough :)

Posted by: Nathan Snell at October 24, 2007 11:45 AM

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About BL Ochman
BL Ochman
Blogger, social media strategy consultant to Fortune 500 companies, and sought-after corporate speaker B.L. Ochman heads the creative team of whatsnextonline.com. She also is the co-founder of Pawfun.com, the custom photo t-shirt site for pet lovers


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