March Madness: A Very Confused Pitch

Confused pitch of the week:

Hi B.L.,
Let's get ready to rumble! It's March Madness, which means, you guessed it: college basketball! The sport is not only filled with excitement, slam-dunks and unbelievable athletes, it is also, inevitably, the spotlight for Cinderella stories. And everyone loves a good Cinderella story Bucknell vs. Duke, Texas A&M vs. UCONN.

Oddly enough, this love of the traditional David and Goliath stories even extends to Internet marketing for small companies.

Establishing a Web presence has become a must for a great percentage of small businesses. Since only one Website can have that number one seed at the top of a search engines results page, chances are most Websites are the underdog. Even at the local level many prospective customers prefer to look for products and services online instead of going through phone directories. Fortunately, for small businesses, search engine optimization can be a small business' Website's J.J. Reddick.

This reminds me of a sign I saw on a business door once: XYZ Law Firm, ABC Caterers. Made me wonder how they answered the phone:" litigation and food, good afternoon" or maybe "suing and cooking."

Let's get ready to vomit! It's an unsolicited non sequitur, which means, you guessed it: BAD PITCH! The release is not only filled with over-exuberance, pith and unbelievable bloviation, it is also, inevitably, the spotlight for misuse of commas. And everyone loves a good sentence fragment.

Oddly enough, this love of stale topical analogies and paradigms even extends to Internet marketing for small companies!

Establishing a Web presence has become a must for a small percentage of great businesses. Since only one Website can have that number one seed at the top of a search engines results page, chances are you'll be number one eventually since there are an infinite number of possible searches!

Even at the local level many prospective customers prefer to look for products and services online, because they're too cheap to get real chairs and use phone books as booster seats. Fortunately, for small businesses, B.L. Ochman can get you to the top in one day, with free press release distribution that only costs $40, when it doesn't cost $120!

har! good one Ike.